Summary
This blog post encourages readers to adopt a unique New Year's resolution focused on achieving 'simpatico' or alignment in personal values and relationships, rather than conventional goals like weight loss or financial targets. It discusses the importance of aligning with people, workplaces, and businesses that share our values and interests to reduce stress from various biases. The post offers a step-by-step exercise to identify these alignments and biases, aiming to enhance personal well-being by fostering environments of understanding and acceptance, and advocating for living a life that truly reflects one's values and aspirations.
As we approach the new year, let’s consider a New Year’s resolution that may be different than
previous years. Let’s avoid focusing on weight loss or even our money…and this is coming from
the nation’s largest Black owned bank.
Instead, let’s focus on loving ourselves and being valued as we are! Let’s focus on finding
simpatico or alignment with our relationships, workplace and even the companies we do business
with to reduce stress caused by biases, including racism, sexism, ageism, homophobia,
partisanship, colorism, religious bias, or fatphobia.
According to Merriam Webster dictionary, simpatico means having shared qualities, interests,
etc. We tend to understand simpatico in our romantic relationships. We search for someone who
we feel is similar or “like minded”. However, when it comes to employers or corporations, we
can get too comfortable being uncomfortable. We may not even realize the day-to-day stress of
not feeling simpatico with all aspects of our lives – where we work, where we live, where we
spend our money and who we choose to spend time with. That stress is a “tax” that ultimately
impacts our health and even our wallet.
So, here is an exercise to achieve a more simpatico life in the new year:
- On the left side of a paper, write down your values (such as wisdom, social justice,
equality, peace, beauty, unity, nature, wealth, the environment, inner harmony,
benevolence, helpfulness, honesty, forgiveness, loyalty, responsibility, friendship, etc.)
and the interests that are important to you. Now do not write down your parent’s interests
for you, but your unique values and interests for yourself. - Below your values and interests, write down the biases that you have either experienced
in your life or fear experiencing based on your uniqueness. Again, don’t listen to others.
Listen to your inner self. Write down biases such as racism, sexism, ageism, homophobia,
partisanship, colorism, religious bias, or fatphobia that have or may cause you stress. - Now on the right side of the paper, write down all the people who you spend time with
including family, friends, coworkers, etc. - Below the people, write down your employer (even if you’re self-employed) and other
companies that you do business with such as vendors, cleaners, grocery stores, schools,
banks, clients, retailers, etc. - Take a black pen and draw a line between your interests and values and the people and/or
companies that share your interests and values. Those lines represent your simpatico
relationships. Hopefully you will have many black lines! - Now take a red pen and draw a line between the biases that you have experienced and/or
fear and the people and/or companies where you have experienced or feel those biases.
Hopefully you will have very few or no red lines.
Simply stated, let our goal for the new year be to maximize the black and minimize the red lines.
Let’s live in the black! At OneUnited Bank, we believe life is too short for us to not find
simpatico or alignment with our relationships, workplace and even the companies we do business
with to reduce stress! Let’s focus on loving ourselves and being valued as we are!